From Darkness to Light: A Journey of Hope

So the darkness shall be the light, and the stillness the dancing. - T.S. Elliot Someone told me once that you are only able to feel the same level of joy and light as you've experienced pain and darkness. That feelings and perception are on a spectrum of +/- because without the comparison, you don't have the appreciation or even knowledge of the opposite alternative. I'm not sure if I'm making sense, but it makes sense to me. There was a point in my life where I had given up completely. Succumed to addiction and knew I'd either end up losing my life or incarcerated. One of which actually happened. But I held onto a sliver of hope that somehow got me through just long enough. And when I was ready to finally give it up, to surrender, to give in, everything I needed seemed to line up in place as signs, support and circumstance. This picture makes me cry. That frantic, anxious, depressed, lost girl would've never been able to lay down on a tree and notice the feeling of the cool air and the smell of the trees. It's important for me to hold on to the memories of who I was then, because it reminds me of how amazing the feeling of being alive and present actually is. The person I used to be is often unrecognizable to me today, but I still remember being her, being there like it was yesterday. I've been hiding that part of me for a long time. I thought that I was inherently flawed in some way. Even though I look at other people who've overcome hardships with such admiration. So I just wanted to say.. that I'm really proud of who I am today and what I've overcome to get here. I've worked my ass off over years and years, each time opening up old wounds and healing a little bit more. Everything I've been through and done has made me more more compassionate, more understanding and more loving of everyone around me. And I wanted you to know that you can do hard things too. You can overcome anything. There is no shame in your struggle and in your pain. It's a part of being human and it's a part of loving and being loved. 💜